Have you ever heard it said that kids could be cruel?  Have you experienced it yourself when you were a child? Were you cruel to others?

It was brought to my attention recently when a friend related her early childhood experience of being ridiculed by her elementary school peers because she was the only child of color in the class. 

Where does that come from?   If those same kids, now adults, could see a video of themselves taunting this innocent child, how would they feel?  Did they grow up to be racists?  Do they have any idea of the pain they put that child through?  

I remember when I was little that we had a girl come to our school from “off” as the expression was at the time.  Her name was Marena.  She was not in my class and I never got to know her. I know nothing about her except she had a hard time breaking through to acceptance, if she ever did.

Over the years I’ve thought of her and wished I had made an effort to help her.  Why didn’t I?  I never did anything against her, but I also didn’t reach out to her as I wish I had.  

What was Marena’s big offense?  She wore her hair in long, blonde braids and wore clothes that were different from ours.  Was she from immigrant parents who dressed her in the ‘old world’ style, maybe from Germany?  I guess I’ll never know.  

How about your kids?  Do they ever speak disparagingly about someone in a narrow minded and bigoted way?  If so,  confront them, and try to find the core of their attitude.  Ask them to listen to what they are saying and then to ask themselves if that is who they really are.  Do they really want to be ‘that’ person who is harsh and unyielding in his acceptance of others?

The most important thing: lead by example.  If you make racist, sexist, weight, age, or other unkind remarks, then all your other words are null and void.  

Hopefully, just the presence of Barack Obama in the White House will help children and adults alike, to look up, not down, on anyone who is different from them.  That’s a heavy burden to add to the already tremendous challenge on his shoulders, but I’m rooting for him.

The Schoolmarm